WriteTogether Reflection: Week One

This week was busy in general, so beginning this writing journey during a busy week was a test of my will power in a lot of ways. The prompts felt right, helping me to take a moment and reflect on where I am in this season of life without making me dig too deep just yet. I felt good about what I was able to get out of my brain. Coming back each day felt good, too.

Still, I found myself a bit stuck on the commitment to writing for five minutes each day, and the idea that I was only writing five minutes each day. I scheduled time for writing every day because I know this part is really important, the experience relies heavily on establishing a habit that doesn’t immediately feel super intimidating. I trust the process; I know the practice is what I need and will become more natural feeling over time. And yet, even though it should be a deeply ingrained habit for me by now, I still had to convince myself.

I suppose that’s exactly why I do these writing journeys alongside everyone else who signs up, honestly.

I use a lot of grounding practices, routines, and other tools to help me keep coming back. And I know it works, because in addition to the rabbit holes of searching I have gone down to back me up, I have years of experience actually doing it. It takes some work though. Not always hard work, and usually not even the annoying kind of work. Just…

As someone who has ADHD and CPTSD, habits actually don’t really stick in the same way and I can’t hold them for long periods of time without an external reminder or pressure triggering my brain back to the habit I was trying to maintain. Even if it is something I love or want to do, like writing.

I am a person too. I will have hard writing days, days where my brain does not function enough for me to get hardly any words out. I will have really good writing days, where the thoughts in my brain flow freely and quickly onto paper. I will have days where I am rushing and pushing things around so I can take even just a little time to write, and I will have days where I am dragging my feet and don’t want to even try.

If you have followed along with any of the writing journeys I have done before, you know that I share a reflection every week on how it went and anything that really stands out to me. I don’t just create or co-create and then offer to others and walk away or only support others through. I walk through the journey too, responding to the prompts through writing the same week they are released.  Before I wrote this reflection, I scheduled my writing times for next week. I will be writing in response to the prompts that are posted for week two, starting tomorrow.

Sometimes I don’t share that part. I don’t really know why, but I felt somewhat compelled to share that this time around. I know how hard or weird it can be sometimes. Yet I come back for more because I know it is worth it. I hope you will too.