#WriteWithMe Reflection: Week 16

This past week had some heavy lifting involved, in every sense of the phrase. In addition to general life stuff and special projects, legislative sessions took up significant space and energy. Reproductive healthcare rights, respect for and affirmation of trans humanity, voter rights, survivor rights, and many other things of similar nature became the center of legislative debate. Issues that directly impact me and my family and my friends and my community, issues that have deadly impact on real actual human beings. The nastiness and vitriol that was spewed by people who claim to represent Love, or life in any form, was disturbing and sickening.  And remains so.

Breathe deeply.

Friends, once again I find myself in a space where I am not quite ready to share what I’ve been reflecting on this week. The prompts from this bonus week were exactly what one would expect in a bonus week prompt set. How was the journey, what did you learn… oh, and while we’re at it, what are the decisions or changes that you need to make now?

Wham!

In the unique position of knowing these prompts are coming and what their purpose is has not made them any more comfortable, staring at me from my inbox. Because I have been practicing slowing down and noticing what is happening within me, the decisions I have been weighing seem weightier, the changes I am making are ones I am feeling more intensely. And putting those things into words is surprisingly difficult, it is uncomfortable to me to not have the vocabulary and energy to do so, to be completely honest.

Yet, discomfort is something I am learning to tune in to and even befriending, part of a practice of courage.

I know this coming week will be full of beautiful and brave and beloved people doing their best to push back and advocate for what is right, and also people full of hate and ugliness trying to power over those they believe will disrupt their tentative proximity to power and privilege. And I know that means it will be another week full of opportunity to practice…

Back next week.

Deep breaths.